WanderLUST

(This blog entry is a three-parter, and the last I'll be writing for a while. Pardon the chattiness, I'm just totally psyched.)

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I was doing lunch with 3 of my close friends from school at a nearby korean restaurant after our class at Dr. Toom's review place was done.

We were talking about a variety of things, mostly medical, amusing stuff, and we got to the part where, one of my friends, Sep, said, "Sonia (not my real name), has wanderlust...you know. She always has to go places...can't stay in one for a very long time... "

Another friend, the only other guy in the table, stopped short and with semi-shocked/surprised widened eyes, asked, "WHAATT??"

(I reckon he only heard the word "LUST" out of the whole "Wanderlust" word that Sep said. It was interesting to see how his mind worked...who knows what images he had conjured in his head then?)

We quickly corrected him, of course...mahirap na if he thought otherwise. ;-)
And, just in case you were wondering too...

WAN-DER-LUST

[won-der-luhst] Show IPA

–noun a strong, innate desire to rove or travel about.
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* Grin*
(K, if you're reading this, just know that I don't mean you any harm, this is purely educational. Peace? :-))
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Another Crazy Dream
About two nights ago, I had a really bad dream. I dreamt that I was on an island about to sink, and then I saw a group of people clinging for dear life to a huge inner tube (a.k.a. a salbabida or floater) to stay afloat. I tried really hard to swim toward it, because I wanted to go with them, but then suddenly, this big, tall gay guy with big feet kicked me away. It was a dang good kick, and it sent me way back to the shore.
I remembered waking up really angry about it...and it was so hot, and airless in the room (someone had turned off the airconditioning) and being all hot always makes me crabby.
It was a bit of a scary dream, actually, and of course, my mind was scrambling as to what it could have meant. I mean, they say that usually dreams are opposites of what usually happens in real life, but I totally did not relish the thought of being kicked like that.

Any revelations for me? What could it possibly mean?
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"Flowers in the Mail"
By the way, I ordered something and I can't wait for it to come in the mail...I'll be getting it a few days before the boards, and I can't wait to taste it. I'm giving it away as pasalubong for my Aussie cuz, for my Paranaque family, and of course for me, and my roomies, and the guys (oh, by the way, I'm the only girl who got invited to the Boy's celebratory eat-all-you-can dinner. Mainly because I'm a dude? I suppose... get this,

Me: "Hey man, aren't you guys going to get awkward with me around? I mean, I'm the only girl there."
M: (shocked) You're a girl??

(That was paraphrased, but you get the idea.)

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Famous Last Words

Anyway, this is it, my last blog entry until after the Big one (in roughly 3 weeks)... :-) Please pray for me. I've done my part, yes, but really, it's out of my hands now. :-)

And yeah, i'll be celebrating my birthday too. If you know my phone number, don' t forget to greet the queen, and if you don't, well...i'll be accepting I.O.U's at my email address. :-)

Things I want for my birthday:

1. World peace. (hehe.)

2. A brand spanking new laptop.

3. Flowers from ...nevermind. :-p

4. an average of 85. (hehe)

5. Closure and Peace of mind. (Yes, i'm still wishing for it.)

and lastly,

6. Answered prayers...

Thanks for putting up with me, people.... You've been a great audience! :-)

NeuroPsych

I've been a big fan of the NeuroPsychiatry program in UST ever since i heard about Dr. S, who graduated from the same program. I went there this afternoon with a schoolmate (who was 5'11", chinese, and the intelligent hunk vibe, but with absolutely no interest in moi, i presume, so it was ok.), who showed me where to get the info and all, and also gave me a bit of an intro of the place.


I have the flier safely in my sling bag, and I'll review that later. It's pretty basic, but it does require that I hand in two recommendation letters by the 28th of August...and submit to an interview and exam on the 29th. It's still an option, i haven't put down my "final plans" in stone as of yet.

'UST is not clannish...and basically, they pick candidates who are good in skills and theory, " he told me matter of factly. He was very helpful, actually, and I have a feeling he's going to get in the Neurosurgery program, piece of cake.

(Good luck!)

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We had an exam at Dr. Toom's place...the material was easier this time around, and i hope i get a good enough score. I was feeling confident, so I decided to have an hour off to go online and blog a little.

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My "sticky" subjects (i.e. subjects I'm not a big fan of) are, Biochemistry and Anatomy. The rest...I like. It doesn't really matter, though, I have to study them all anyway.

Honestly, I can't really decide if i want to get this all over with, or if i want this to extend on and on so i can postpone making very final decisions. I want to take two weeks off after all this, make money, and then get on with my life...and hopefully, fix up my love life which is pretty much in a shambles, and do some travelling.

Simple enough, eh?

Fixing up my love life, means fixing myself too. That last one taught me a lot of lessons and had me in tears at certain points in time, but it was inevitable. When one makes choices, one has to "suffer" the consequences.

I just wished there was more kindness involved, that's all.

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Moving on... here's one movie i'd like to catch, because even if it's got a lot of cheese factor, the male protagonists are, well, oooh-la-la.. haha. so there. :-)




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sorry

scratch that...i take it back.

i wouldn't wish bad health on anyone I know...especially not the kid of "someone i used to know."

it's not a good thing to be wishing for.

:-) anyway...19 days left.

The fantasy of the brown-eyed baby boy

The rains have come, and I'm pretty sure I'll be able to get a taste of what a friend of mine claims, "..is part of every Thomasian's life." :-)

I rather hope i won't have to do any "wading", though. There is such a thing as Leptospirosis and all the other unhealthy "details" that you can get from floodwaters.

I hope everyone I know is well and safe. Ma said that the news said that there were floods in Iloilo and Bacolod, as well.

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I'm doing Pediatrics now, which is a Waterloo (i.e. Napoleon was defeated at the Battle of Waterloo) subject for many people, according to my reviewer. Many people don't like it, and honestly, I have to say it's not one of my favorites. It's easier to study though, because I absolutely adore babies and kids.

Also, I study with the thought of "What if..?" in mind.

For example...

WHAT IF, I was on duty in the hospital, and in the middle of the night, EX would come in, with his wife and baby boy (who had pretty brown eyes like he did), who was cyanotic and unconscious... To make the long story short, without much stress, i would be able to revive him and take care of everything without breaking out a sweat...

It's a nice fantasy, i suppose, and it justifies why things are the way they are these days.

It has happened before, you know, although it wasn't with an EX. This guy i had a crush on in high school suddenly showed up at 2 in the morning with his wife, bringing their newborn baby girl, who they thought was "breathing funny". I was on duty for Surgery, and not Pediatrics, but since I knew them, and I was the only Intern there, I did the initial check-up.

The baby was ok, and eventually, she checked out fine. She was a cute little bugger who had no idea she was giving her parents a fright. :-p In the end, they both said thank you, and it felt pretty good. And they went home.

And i went back to work.

And then went home.

And then went back to work again.

lol.

(I don't mean to sound bitter about it, I love my job, but it's quite obvious that my contemporaries are settling down and I am not. yet. But that's another topic for another day. :-))

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For all those who have texted, "How are you?" Well, i'm doing ok, thank you very much. I haven't really been blogging about reviewing and all that, like i had initially planned, but I have been doing exactly that. Reviewing.

:-)

Regrets?

The past few days have been draining... travelling to Fairview and back for a "patok" review session with a popular reviewer who taught Biochemistry. She is notoriously famous for reviewing "patok" a.k.a. "Sure Thing" stuff on the said subject.

Biochem has never been my cup of tea, and many others would agree, so as a class, we trooped to the bus stop at as early as 6am so we could catch a ride to Fairview QC.

I'm not a really big fan of it, fairview...:-p The review class she gave was interesting. She had good command of biochemistry, and made it look so easy, but then she had the habit of injecting zany (and green)Cebuano jokes every now and then. We furiously scribbled notes. Patok is the word. and we're all needy.

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The past is the past...and we have to stand by the choices we make. If we chose our dreams over the loves we had, then we have to be ready to face the consequences.

If our old loves find new loves, then we really can't do anything about that, can we?

I can't be profound, i've lost it sometime in the last few months when I decided that I wanted something more out of life.

It's a long story, but I have to say, I hurt. I hurt because of a choice I made...

There is no going back and salvaging anything.

I am utterly powerless now.

Weak with regret? maybe.

Needing peace. Of course.

Jealous of the "new love"? Yes.

Crunch time

... is now.