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Monday, May 23, 2011

Anticipation

Timepiece. From Dr. JCP's uber cool
Balinese inspired clinic. April 2011.
Ooh…I love quickie lists!


For fun, if I had more time I’d probably…


Read Vladimir Nabokov’s Lolita (someone told me the story one time and I want to read the tragicomedy myself), or Anna Karenina (which apparently takes one whole summer to finish), or heck, all three books of Lord of the Rings (because it’s so cool, and I haven’t had the time to do it?)

I’d also learn how to speak in French, because baby, I don’t want to be the little cherie whose only claim to fame in the world is that I know what Je ne parles pas francais is. And besides, it’s fun.

Which also should be followed up with maybe I should learn how to do sign language. Which reminds me, one of my co-residents presented a case for grand rounds about her treating a psychotic patient who was both deaf and mute. Can you imagine how much of a challenge it must be to communicate with a patient like that one? (It’s a hard enough challenge to help someone to get well by talking to them about it…how much more if they can’t say anything. (I’d probably be unstoppable.haha)




Maybe I’d also like to put all the pictures I took ever since I started being a mad shutterbug (2005) together into a collection, because frankly, I never have gotten around to doing it.



I’d also like to Finish watching my six seasons of “The Sopranos”. ‘cause it’s a really cool show. *big grin*

And maybe play more tennis? Cute playmates optional.

Oh, and not just because I’m a fan of the Philippine Azkals, but I’d also give more time to learn  to love football. What can I say, I love the energy and enthusiasm, and I love the man.

J

Hmm..what else? Oh, learn how to cook inun-unan, and other useful meals besides. To be perfectly honest, I don’t even eat breakfast anymore… I have boxes of milk in my fridge, and I just grab one on the way out the door, and that’s instant breakfast.

Write out my notes and study all day is also another fun thing to do, if I had more time.  ;-)

Ooh, and I want to join a show choir too! ‘cause it’s not always fun to just keep singin in the shower all the time! I would love to break out into song every once in a while. :-p

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Time is a treasure, yes, but having money would be more fun too.

So here’s my  tick-off list:
·       Get a house for my family, with lots of space and fun stuff…and wide wide open spaces.
·        Get my own fun condo for living in. because I’m loving city living so much these days. ;-)
·        Have a good psychiatric rehabilitation facility with a sustainable medication program and psychosocial skills training  and community psychoeducation in my home town (‘cause there’s none officially to begin with, sadly.)
·         Lobby for government insurance covered psychiatric care for Filipinos (sorry, I can’t help the psychiatry causes plug.:-p).
·        
          Buy me books for a library.
·    OR…buy an Ipad2 with gigabytes worth of ebooks. Of course.
·   Buy the local elementary school a library (yes, I’m all for books for kids. J).
·   To walk in absolutely any store and buy what I want without having to look at the price tag.
·   And with that, to be able to pick out any place in the world to go to, with as many people as I want to, to go there. (super fun idea, especially if you have fun family like I have.)
·        
And well, I’d like to have some surgery (the best) done.

 Specifically: elbow joint replacement surgery. Tendon transfers. Ulnar nerve Neurorraphy. Scar surgery on my left arm.

Well, it’s not really an issue, but I kind of miss having a normal arm. And a good backhand. And maybe to not keep bumping my forearm into stuff (loss of proprioception happens sometimes.). and maybe to feel what it’s like to hold hands and touch my face with the left.

J Oops. Wish list, not Whine list. My bad.

Cheers!
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I’ve been having a strange feeling these days…

When I was kid growing up, I had big dreams.

(I still do.)

I always wanted to be doing something…I always wanted to be something bigger…be somewhere else.  I was a ball of energy, always wanting to explore, always wanting more than what I had, even to the point of dreaming of things near-impossible. So much so, that I remember that my mother’s constant admonition was that we should not dream too big.

For a time, I resented that, because I felt that there was really nothing I couldn’t do, nor achieve unless I put my mind to it.

Ah…the energy of youth is boundless and perhaps foolish at times.

It was only just recently when I realized that my mother didn’t necessarily mean that I shouldn’t dream big…I could now swear that she meant to dream big foolishly, but to have a plan to carry it through, and do it all, and get it all, at the right time.

Perhaps I was too impatient then, that I didn’t realize right away that everything that was meant to happen will happen…once you’re really ready for it. I’m still far from being contented with my lot in life now, that I’ll settle for whatever I have now.

But instead of discontent, it’s more of a feeling of…anticipation. I have this pent up energy now, but it is not borne of a need to covet more and more, I am just in wait. (I don’t know if you get what I mean…it’s like, basta, I know something good will happen.)

Yet, even in this semi-content state, I still probably wouldn’t mind the wish list I did for Gaya’s blog entry fun. And that, Ladies and Gentlemen, was my entry for Gaya’s Blog Rounds Extravaganza, episode 2.





J

1 comment:

  1. Lo-li-ta! First time I heard about Nabokov, he is sooo ... well, Russian until I realized he's a god of a prose stylist.

    I thought you'd say, To walk in absolutely any store without being bothered by fans. Haha! I'll have that on my list. lol

    Teka, remind me nga again why psychiatry, Steph?

    ReplyDelete

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