Plain and simple

Street kids enjoying a mid-rush hour nap.
May 18, 2011 (Photo by Me.)

I can’t sleep.

Well, at least not yet… I had just finished typing up my interaction sheet, a “must-have” for us residents, now that we are preparing for the accreditation team’s visit, so that the Department of Psychiatry will have its “usual” (expected) 5 year accreditation. This is quite an achievement, considering we are the only hospital (aside from my old hospital in Iloilo, where I did Medicine) to ever be awarded this privilege. Most hospitals get just three…or worse, one.

Paperwork, paperwork…

I love thee. I hate thee.

:-s I’m two-faced about this writing and paperwork thing. Oh yes, I do love to do paperwork, but in the same way, I don’t. I think it’s all too tedious at times. And, because I pride myself on having a pretty good memory for detail (especially if I really focus on the thing), I have the tendency to just say, “hey, I’ll do that when I get home.”

At the end of the day, when I’m home and all tired and drained, I usually just fall asleep, and don’t wake up until early morning. These past few weeks and days, I’ve been putting a conscious effort to just sit down (and not flit about) until I finish something.

And so here I am.

I’m on-duty now, waiting for a call. Hoping to fall asleep soon, but failing.

From the callroom’s foyer a manly scent wafts all the way over here, and I am annoyed.

It’s not supposed to be there. (I will have to discuss this infraction with my senior in the morning.)

----

The interaction sheet is a record of what each resident did that day, such as how many patients he’d seen, how many minutes or hours he spent with them, what came out of it, and what his management was.  It’s basically something to track our time at work with.

 The Accreditors in December will be looking over our paperwork and what we had done during the past year. (I’ve only started in January, and so far, my sheets are piling up…I don’t see that many patients compared to the other services, but hey, I was surprised at the number of files I’ve had to keep after all.)

i.e. “What do psychiatry residents do when they’re not talking to people?”

Documenting what you did every minute or every hour is just plain…toxic.

But it’s good, and I know I’ll be thankful when December comes, because it won’t be such a last-minute thing.

A little anxiety to get the juices flowing is essential to kick things off, but panic mode? Nah. None of that anymore… J

------

I hate ambiguity.

I dislike ambivalence.

I just like things plain and simple.

I was annoyed this morning when one of the consultants told my co-resident (who also graduated from the same medical school I did) and myself that we should’ve stayed in Iloilo because the Psychiatry program there was the best in the country. And this was from someone who was from our hospital, for goodness sake.  (I thought you said _ _ _ was the best, man? What gives??)

I have my reasons for wanting to do my training in Manila and not in Iloilo. I have nothing against working in Iloilo, but I always felt that I needed to fulfill a certain childhood dream to be here. Or that I needed to be where my heart was. Or that I needed to be where I was going to be taught the most lessons.

To have him say something like that sorely disappointed me.

And I hate being disappointed.

It hurts.