Wednesday, May 27, 2009


i have this friend i've known for years. he is quite successful, and is saying that he will be marrying his girlfriend of seven years. I reckon one of his secrets in getting to where he was at right now was because he was very...practical. For lack of a better word, that's what i would describe how he doesn't let emotions get in the way of what he wants. What he wants, he works hard at and gets result.

That seems like a pretty sound way of doing cannot afford to let one's emotions rule one's actions or let them get the better of him or her. i only have two months left before "the big one", i shouldn't let my troubles and worries get the better of me.

As far as i can see, it's going to be hard getting everything together...but i will try. I can't let all the pressure, the hurt, the disappointments, and all that negative energy get to me. I just wish life were more fair.

The school work and the studying i can handle, it's all the other outside stuff that i don't have control of that are troubling me. I'm finding it hard to focus without a much needed resolution. Be kind.


Speaking of my friend, he told me that his gf was someone he had had a crush on when he was younger, and then they somehow ended up together (although I'm pretty sure he had had a hand in the whole thing, knowing him, haha). Those relationships are the best, when two people genuinely like each other (read: crazy about each other), and have many things in common. Everything always works when both parties want it to, really. If only one does, then, it's totally not going to work.

Life is not always fair in the love department.


I feel generally down today. Sorry. I kept thinking about how i used to be so lighthearted and positive, but these past few days, I've felt off.

I needed to get away, so i went off to the local mall by myself, just wandering around while waiting for my order to get done. Uncertainty and impatience, annoyance and disappointment are roiling inside me now, and I can't seem to find any relief. I want to get away from everyone i know for a few days and not have to think about anything or anyone that will make me feel sorry for myself.


The only highlight of my day was when i got to sit in at the UST board review classes for the day. The instructors were intelligent and polished and had great powerpoints...very high standard. It reminded me of why I was attracted to be in Medicine when i was younger...i loved the high standard, the prestige, the importance and the precision of the field. :-)


I almost got lost, after i decided to walk home after the cab queue was full... i almost took a wrong turn and would have ended up in a seedy dead-end with who knows what. But, since I was a good girl, I think Providence decided that it wasn't my time, and that I wasn't going to be harmed in anyway.

I found the way home...


We have an exam tomorrow. I better get home. (We have Rosary Time at 8PM).


  1. I like this post esp about that heart thing. I feel almost the same way too. The old Marley is hiding somwehere. Hinahanap ko pa...

  2. I have moments like that, too, when I realize, I used to be so HAPPY? Why am I feeling like life is letting me down?

    Hmmm... it's either the dementors have reached the Philippines, or life is just like that sometimes. It could be worse...

    And don't let the pressure of the boards get to you. Okay, so that's easy to say from the other side, pero...just give yourself a break from time to time. No one's ever totally ready anyway. :) God bless sa boards tep...

  3. Hi Sonia,

    Feel ko ang iyong damdamin...

    Ingat ka dyan sa big, bad city, ha.

    Bitaw, dili man all bad ng Manila. I just can't stand the pollution.

    Study well!!! Mind over (heart) matter muna.

  4. Thanks C. :-)

    Gaya, hi. I think i have "over-emoting"tendencies's nothing serious, really, i think i just need some time off from all the "seriousness". There are just some things you can't have any control of.

    Hi doc ness! :-) yeah, i hear about horror stories about pockets getting picked and snatching incidents. I'm being really careful. :-)



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