I'm on-duty, and Dave, my junior is in their room working on his own stuff... we had a bit of a talk over dinner. An endorsement/chika session/anamnesis kind of thing, over Italianni's takeout from Trina (which I alone ate, 'cause he was done eating already...).
Perhaps I don't have much to say tonight, just that I'm very tired, and I've had my patience tried, but its a good thing... I've had some pretty good consults at follow-up today, and let me tell you, there's no fulfillment like the kind you get when people's lives are improved because of something you did help them with.
As I was walking down the stairs from the 6th floor back down to the call room, I remember getting this funny thought...I had to smile. I was where I've always wanted to be, I was studying Psychiatry, I was in Manila, and shweet, I love my job!
:-)
I don't want to be too cocky, but sometimes, I just feel very...happy about it. I followed my heart (literally,:-)) and look where I ended up? I suppose things didn't turn out the way I might have originally intended for them to, but like with everything else, eventually I always get what I want...and it turns out to be just what I need, when I need it...
:-) Like right now...
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My eyes hurt, and I have a bit of a headache, and I only wish that the other Pay referral/admission doesn't push through, because frankly, I'm tired. 'Active Listening' takes out a lot more from me than I have expected. When I said I was a good listener before, I had no idea it was going to be such a big job. Listening (i mean, really listening) is not as easy as it sounds. It seems, with every second or minute into the interview, all of your senses are in hyperdrive...ready to pick up every nuance, every lilt in the voice, every pause, every flicker and flutter of the eyelids, every detail in the speech patterns...
...so you can know what is wrong with the other person.
Mind reading?
So not our gig.
We don't just "read minds", we read....people.
:-)
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One of my patients gave me a little bag of mango bars from Red Ribbon. I love the stuff...mango flavored pastry, with bits of dried mango in it. very nice. all that's missing is a bottle of Coke. :-)
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I found the most perfect book. It's Interviewing by McKinnon. I hope to read it and get it done soon, because it's really really helpful.
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Maybe one of the reasons why I chose to help a patient with anxiety and "the fear of death", was because, well, I didn't have any. And I needed to know how it worked...
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A friend of mine just asked me to be a godmother to his little baby girl... and I had to say I was honored (I was.), but then he said he had to consult his wifey first, so I chuckled. For someone he was astig as hell, he was turning out to be such a softie... He actually was a nice guy.
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Someone I met today...
 |
| Little Marcus (B.)...isn't he a little cutie? :-) |
He's the baby boy of one of our favorite nurses...so big for his age. And stylin' too... :-)
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| That's him, dreaming of being in Milk Land. :-) |
:-) I want to have a baby someday. And when I do, I want him/her to be perfect...and to have a daddy who loves him to bits.
Soon.
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And now I have a paper to write...I am planning to show what I've done to my supervisor tomorrow, so she can see how far I've gone with therapy...
Love,
S.
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